Sol Luckman
🌲 You’re invited to rock out to this censored video to the tune of “The Twelve Days of Christmas” penned by yours truly and masterfully performed by fellow Substacker Brendan D. Murphy.
🎤 If you’d like to record a song or make a music video using these lyrics, you have my permission to do so provided 1) you keep the title and text as is; 2) you credit Sol Luckman with a live link to this blog post; 3) you do not charge or receive money for the song or video in any way without my written consent; and 4) you allow me to mirror any audio recordings or music videos of your song on my various current or future platforms.
HOW THE DEEP STATE STOLE CHRISTMAS
[Verse 1]
On the first day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Corona where it once was free
[Verse 2]
On the second day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Two quarantines, and
Corona where it once was free
[Verse 3]
On the third day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Three lockdowns,
Two quarantines, and
Corona where it once was free
[Verse 4]
On the fourth day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Four talking heads,
Three lockdowns,
Two quarantines, and
Corona where it once was free
[Verse 5]
On the fifth day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Five … chipped … vaccines,
Four talking heads,
Three lockdowns,
Two quarantines, and
Corona where it once was free
[Verse 6]
On the sixth day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Six websites fibbing,
Five … chipped … vaccines,
Four talking heads,
Three lockdowns,
Two quarantines, and
Corona where it once was free
[Verse 7]
On the seventh day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Seven maskholes masking,
Six websites fibbing,
Five … chipped … vaccines,
Four talking heads,
Three lockdowns,
Two quarantines, and
Corona where it once was free
[Verse 8]
On the eighth day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Eight thugs rioting,
Seven maskholes masking,
Six websites fibbing,
Five … chipped … vaccines,
Four talking heads,
Three lockdowns,
Two quarantines, and
Corona where it once was free
[Verse 9]
On the ninth day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Nine Faucis waffling,
Eight thugs rioting,
Seven maskholes masking,
Six websites fibbing,
Five … chipped … vaccines,
Four talking heads,
Three lockdowns,
Two quarantines, and
Corona where it once was free
[Verse 10]
On the tenth day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Ten fraudsters rigging,
Nine Faucis waffling,
Eight thugs rioting,
Seven maskholes masking,
Six websites fibbing,
Five … chipped … vaccines,
Four talking heads,
Three lockdowns,
Two quarantines, and
Corona where it once was free
[Verse 11]
On the eleventh day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Eleven Pelosis plotting,
Ten fraudsters rigging,
Nine Faucis waffling,
Eight thugs rioting,
Seven maskholes masking,
Six websites fibbing,
Five … chipped … vaccines,
Four talking heads,
Three lockdowns,
Two quarantines, and
Corona where it once was free
[Verse 12]
On the twelfth day of Christmas the Deep State sent to me
Twelve commies thieving,
Eleven Pelosis plotting,
Ten fraudsters rigging,
Nine Faucis waffling,
Eight thugs rioting,
Seven maskholes masking,
Six websites fibbing,
Five … chipped … vaccines,
Four talking heads,
Three lockdowns,
Two quarantines, and a
Great Reset where it once was free
🎉 Happy Holidays—despite it all!
Copyright © Sol Luckman. All Rights Reserved.
🥸 Were you aware that a fetish (n.) is anything, such as the stock market, falsely believed by primitive peoples to possess divine, magical or supernatural qualities?
🤓 Did you know that disclosure (n.) is when they finally tell us everything and nothing changes?
😇 THE ANGEL’S DICTIONARY, Winner of the 2017 National Indie Excellence Award for Humor and Finalist in the Humor category of both the 2018 International Book Awards and the 2018 Best Book Awards, defines these terms this way—so they must be true!
👹 Here are a few more deliciously veracious definitions from this SPIRITED GLOSSARY FOR THE LITTLE DEVIL IN YOU boasting over 500 laugh-out-loud entries …
waffle: (n.) breakfast of politicians.
antidepressant: (n.) any of various energetic techniques for warding off parasitic friends, colleagues, and family members.
bathroom: (n.) where Americans go to argue about gender while the country goes down the toilet.
census: (n.) being counted so we can be discounted.
Dowist: (n.) blind believer in the stock market.
fanny-pack: (v.) to put on a few extra pounds during the holiday season.
global warming: (n.) result of excessive hot-air emissions by climate scientists.
hospital: (n.) where the healthy go to get misdiagnosed and the sick go to get mistreated.
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